E: Fanamy. Famany. Family. Family. Me: Our family. Who’s in our family? E: Ethan! Loot! (Luke). Me: Yes! Who else? E: Rotty (Rocky the dog). Me: Yes Rocky’s our family. Who else? E: Mummy and Daddy and toys! Seems I’m on a par with Thomas the Tank Engine. Hmm!
E: What’s that mummy? (points at my bra) Me: That’s my bra. E: What’s a bra do? Me: I wear a bra and it holds my boobs. E: so they don’t fall. Me: yes darling. E: and keeps your boobs on.
I’m on my way to the hairdressers and was explaining to E that I was going to get my haircut. His response: ‘and you will get a lollipop mummy!’.
E: That tree has been cut down. That one over there. Me: Yes and it just leaves a stump. E: Yes a stump and a SNAKE!
Job description of a fireman: E: This is a fire engine mummy. I sit in the fire engine. I drive the fire engine. A fire engine has ladders mummy and a man climbs up the ladders and washes the windows.
I arrived home from work one day this week to discover E, after a bit of a strop, had taken the books from one of his bookshelves and dropped them all over the floor. We tidied up and I took the one book he had ripped pages from, to try to repair it. Me: You …
(while shooting my boobs) E: I shoot your boobs mummy! I shoot your boobs again mummy! Me: I’ll have no boobs left at this rate! E: I buy you more boobs mummy! So there we have it. I knew he was going to be rich and successful but so generous too!? How many sons pay …